This made so much sense at the beginning

Babes in Toyland

What do you say to a big kiss?

It's not long enough, but I do.

He's got trolls! Hundreds of ugly trolls. And they ate all the cookies.

We could cut about three heroes out of you.

We'll see about that next Wednesday.

[wh] You would think that a Christmas-special movie with Keanu Reeves and Drew Barrymore would be quite a hit, but somehow Pat Morita takes away from the great acting ability of those two. Actually the ridiculous plot, poor acting, and absurdity of this movie in general take it away from Pat Morita even. Only redeeming thing of this movie is the strange up-the-skirt shot of an 11-year-old Drew Barrymore, exposing her white cotton panties. What is that doing in a Christmas-special?


[whoooa] This is, of course, a musical. Thusly the high(ish) rating. Seeing Keanu sing the “Cincinnati” song not once, but twice, makes this one worth watching over and over. This fabulous song also manages to save our heroes in their ultimate moment of peril. Keanu seems to be sporting almost a codpiece in this, which is neither here nor there – just a statement. Bert’s green gas expelling thumb is almost a superhero type power (especially considering it is animated gas, too). Could potentially be seen a war movie, as the Toymaster (not the Keymaster from the Matrix movies) sends toy soldiers up against Richard Mulligan’s tree/mud soldiers. The environment loses in this battle to the toys. Seems like the correct message to me. Take that, “Two Towers!” Has Keanu’s 1st fight scene (not involving him killing Charles Bronson) and him getting married (not to the 10 year old Drew Barrymore, you perv!). And a giant (some might say “Big”) bird waving a cucumber. Movies don’t need much more than that.



Eileen BrannanMrs. Piper/Widow Hubbard
Googy GressGeorge/Georgie Porgie
Pat MoritaThe Toymaster
Pipo SosmanJack in the Box
Richard MulliganBarnie/Barnaby Barnicle
Wanda BurkeCookie Factory Worker

What time is it in Indianapolis, anyway? — life under water